WHY DO YOU APOLOGIZE FOR EXISTING?
Why You Apologize Too Much (And What To Say Instead)
Many people think over-apologizing is being polite. In reality, it often comes from a deeper pattern called the fawn response, a trauma-based habit of people pleasing to stay safe.
It shows up everywhere.
You apologize for being late.
You apologize for talking too long.
You apologize for asking questions.
You apologize for existing.
Over time, this teaches others to see you as a burden instead of a contributor. It also quietly trains your own nervous system to shrink.
There’s a simple shift that changes the dynamic.
Replace apology with gratitude.
Instead of saying, “Sorry I took so much of your time,” try, “Thank you for taking the time to meet with me.” Instead of apologizing for asking a question, thank someone for their patience or support.
This does three powerful things.
It preserves your dignity.
It communicates respect without self-blame.
It strengthens connection instead of weakening your presence.
This matters in leadership, relationships, sales, and everyday conversations. You do not need to apologize for having needs, taking space, or participating fully.
Gratitude builds bridges. Chronic apology builds self-doubt.
If this reframed how you communicate, watch the full video for practical examples. Share this with someone who over-apologizes. And if you’re looking for a speaker who helps leaders build emotionally intelligent communication cultures, I’d love to connect.