YUCK MY YUM
Yucking Someone’s Yum and the Fastest Way to Kill Connection
It sounds harmless.
Someone tells you they love apple pie with cheddar cheese.
You say, “Ew.”
But what you really just said was, “You are wrong for liking that.”
That is called yucking someone’s yum, and it is one of the fastest ways to kill intimacy, creativity, and trust.
In my recent video, I talk about how sharing something you love is an emotional offering. Whether it is food, music, a hobby, a kink, or a dream, the moment someone says, “I like this,” what they are really saying is, “Here is a piece of me.”
When that gets met with ridicule or dismissal, the nervous system learns something important. It is not safe to share here.
Most yums are not harmful. They are simply different. The urge to judge them is rarely about taste. It is about control, the need to pull someone back into what feels familiar and comfortable to us.
Curiosity does the opposite.
“Tell me about that.”
“I have never heard of that before.”
“That is interesting.”
Those responses keep people open.
Great leaders, partners, and friends know how to hold someone’s yum gently. That is how psychological safety is built.
If this resonates, watch the video, share it with someone who leads people, and leave a comment. If you plan events for leaders and want this work brought into your organization, let's talk.